Cringe Demon Queen Decrees Sexual Health Directives

Out of concern for the livelihoods of demonites across the Cringe Impyre, our benevolent ruler Lucy Anne Pyre has decided to start a Sexual Health and Wellness course at Demon Harvard. While participation in the full course is restricted to the fair and few that make it into Demon Harvard and elect to take the course, our benevolent, galaxy brained, sexo rizz god, ruler has released a list of mandatory sexual health best practices. ONN would like to remind viewers that we are definitely not a biased mouth piece for the Cringe Impyre ruling class and certainly do not have a gun to our heads. For demonites’ own well-being and the advancement of the Cringe Impyre the following standards must be observed:

• Just as you squeeze from the bottom of the toothpaste tube, do remember when filling barrel quotas to squeeze the balls until fully evacuated

• Please see a qualified physician if you feel like your balls have separated

• Quarterly laser prostate exams are now mandatory

• Drink plenty of calcium to strengthen erection bones

• Vasectomies are henceforth illegal as they may interfere with the process of fulfilling quotas

• Please see a qualified physician if you show any signs of having a refractory period

• Please set aside 15 minutes per day for testicular torsion exercises to strengthen the nut muscles